Much better.

Anyway, to the point --> what's up with the lack of love for all things knightly these days, hmmm?

Think about it: Ninjas, Cowboys, Pirates, Space Cowboys, Space-Ninja-Pirate-Cowboys, telemarketers who moonlight as paid-programming television evangelists at 3:30 am on Fox (etc.) ALL get their spot in the sun of popular culture (note that when I say "spot in the sun" I really mean "choice place in the radioactive garbage heap" that is our popular culture, but that's very much beside the point).

... Robots also get it way too good. Who likes a robot, anyway? As everyone knows- the only really worthwhile robot is one that's evil, insane, and bent on the destruction of the human race. Batty Computers in charge of human society "for our own good" can be cool too I guess, but only if they accuse people of being Commies and get them zapped). All other robots should clearly be relegated to side-kick status and let the knights handle things. After all, knights are the original rusty tin buckets who whack things proper till they die (though, come to think of it: brilliant and clinically depressed robots, ala The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy ARE pretty cool... the point is they're NOT as cool as clinically depressed knights wielding a pointed metal stick)

And so the point, naturally, is... where the hell are the knightly folk in this whole spiffy, way-cool ninja-pirate-robot love extravaganza?! (Telemarketers were excluded on account of the Pure Evil Factor... Cowboys because... well I forgot them and was too lazy to fix it). Now I'm as much a fan of pirates and ninjas as the next mentally deranged person who runs a crappy website, and I grant you that ninjas have the whole katana thing going, and pirates have their "whole boats, parrots and scurvy" thing working for them...

... but STILL: knights have the large choppy devices! Plus they get to work with the burning oil, loot & pillage, and (on some occasions) get lifelong and generally fruitless quests from the Big Guy to find Junior's old cup (which he apparently forgot to pack when prepping for that whole shedding the old mortal-coil thing; shows what happens when you leave packing to the last minute and get all careless and over-hasty with the job).

Moreover--> They're (knights) tough motherfuckers. I could talk about the whole melee and mounted combat business and milling about in ridiculously heavy metal suits, but to be honest I'm not really planning on it. Really I think we can best establish how tough they are by looking at the uber-historically accurate glance at the knightly life that is Monty Python:

Black Knight: Have at you!
Arthur: You are indeed brave, sir knight, but the fight is mine.
Black Knight: Oh, had enough eh?
Arthur: Look, you stupid bastard. You've got NO ARMS left!
Black Knight: Yes I have.
Arthur: Look!
Black Knight: Just a flesh wound!
(Monty Python and the Holy Grail)

See?! What did I tell you- tough bastards, eh? ... Yeah let's see your bloody ninja still be ready and in "flip out and kill people" (with all credit of course to realultimatepower.net) mode without his friggin' ARMS!!!

I think infinitely more importantly then even that, is the fact that knight's get to say spiff stuff like "Ye, Thou, Varletry, Wench, Huzzah" and so forth (note to self: start using these words more often... maybe all at once... through a megaphone ... while swinging a largish axe-like device with wild abandon... at a nearby bystander and his pet goat, and... no, no I get ahead of myself)

The End. Oh, except I will admit that this whole ranty thing is here because I wanted a caption for my poorly edited (yet oh so spiffy, if I do say so myself) Paint image... and discovered: I'm REALLY not all that succint... Well, we'll work on it, maybe even replace this rant with something relevant eventually ;-)

... Nah.

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